A Growing Anxiety

When, near the end of April 2025, the Trump administration floated ways to motivate women to have more children—including a $5,000 “baby bonus”—it was focusing on an anxiety shared on both sides of the political aisle. The U.S. Centers for Disease Control (CDC) had recently released a report showing that birthrates had dipped to historic lows—a slump, which according to the New York Times “worries demographers and cultural critics.”

Simply put, women are having fewer and fewer babies.

According to aggregated research, the Total Fertility Rate (average number of children per woman throughout her lifetime) peaked in 1959 at 3.75 births per woman. Today, that number has fallen to 1.62. In order to preserve a population, that number must be something above 2. A shrinking population—and with it, labor shortages, healthcare system overload, school and university closures—is baked into the numbers.

Why Are People Having Fewer Children?

The big question is: Why are people choosing to have fewer children? Obviously, it would require something like divine omniscience to answer that question for each person, but some have cited the exorbitant cost as one factor. Recent estimates put the cost of raising a child at $20,000 per year. Moreover, vehicles and homes tend not to be designed for families larger than six. 

But is the cost of raising children the main reason people are choosing not to have children?

Writing for The Atlantic, Christina Emba argues that while cost may be a factor, the deeper reason is not about money: it’s about meaning. “In trying to solve the fertility puzzle,” she writes,

thinkers have cited people’s concerns over finances, climate change, political instability, or even potential war. But in listening closely to people’s stories, I’ve detected a broader thread of uncertainty—about the value of life and a reason for being. Many in the current generation of young adults don’t seem totally convinced of their own purpose or the purpose of humanity at large, let alone that of a child. It may be that for many people, absent a clear sense of meaning, the perceived challenges of having children outweigh any subsidy the government might offer.

I think Emba is right. An ambiguity toward the meaning of life, combined with an individualistic (“me-centered”) approach to fulfillment and satisfaction, is more effective than any method of birth-control. It’s not only eroding spiritual life; it’s stunting biological life too.

Does It Make Sense to Have Children in a World Without Meaning?

In a worldview in which human value is not anchored in the image of God, and the future is uncertain or bleak, children can be viewed as a burden, even a liability. Add to this worldview a vision of life that is individualistic, career-centered, and self-actualizing, and there is hardly room for a child, much less a home full of them.

Such a view of children would have been unthinkable in ancient agrarian cultures, where children were essential for survival. In a farming society, more children meant more hands to work the land, ensuring the family’s livelihood. Kids were social security, health insurance, legacy.

Infertility, accordingly, wasn’t just a personal sorrow—it was a existential crisis. A woman who couldn’t bear children was a shame to her family. No wonder, in Genesis 30:1, Rachel cries to Jacob, “Give me children, or I will die!”

So, which view is right? The modern model of optional parenthood based on personal fulfillment? Or the ancient view of children as essential for livelihood and legacy?

The Bible’s View: Children Are a Blessing from God

Although the Bible is an ancient book, it’s purpose is not to call us to adopt ancient cultural viewpoints. Rather, it cuts across all cultures, whether ancient or modern. When it comes to children, it affirms their immense value, while grounding our identity and fulfillment in something greater.

Consider how, on the one hand, the Bible affirms the goodness of children—and how this is a direct contrast to the modern view. God told humans to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). Psalm 127 celebrates children as “a heritage from the Lord,” and compares them to “arrows in the hand of a warrior” meaning that they can extend a person’s influence beyond his or her personal reach.

The very storyline of the Bible, in fact, runs on the theme of people having—or struggling to have—babies: from Eve’s giving birth to Cain, Abel, and Seth, to the infertility struggles of Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, and Hannah, to Mary’s giving birth to Jesus.

In Matthew 19:14, we get a glimpse into God’s heart for children when Jesus says, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” In a culture where children had no status, Jesus welcomed them, affirming their worth as image-bearers of God.

Children Are More Important Than We Realize, but Having Children Is Not Ultimate

And yet, on the other hand, the Bible never makes the bearing of children one’s ultimate good. Jesus himself never married or had children. Paul, likewise, remained celibate. Yet their lives were not seen as incomplete. More radically, Jesus taught, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children . . . such a person cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26).

In a world that made family everything, Jesus redrew the lines of identity—not around blood, but around himself.

In Matthew 12:46–50, when someone told Jesus that his mother and brothers were looking for him, he pointed to his followers right around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” Similarly, in Luke 11:27–28, when a woman shouts, “Blessed is the mother who gave you birth!” Jesus replies, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.” Even Mary’s greatest blessing wasn’t to be found in bearing Jesus but in believing in him as her Savior—a blessing available to all.

This double-edged truth—that children are a blessing, but not ultimate—cuts across both ancient and modern cultures. To a world that idolizes family, Jesus says, “I am your true identity.” To a world that devalues children, he says, “They are a gift from God.” This perspective brings value to children, purpose to parents, and comfort to the childless.

When it comes to the Bible’s view of children, we learn this truth: your value doesn’t depend on having children or who your family is. It’s rooted in Christ alone.

Matthew 18 tells us that Jesus’ disciples were arguing about their status in God’s kingdom. Jesus responded by calling a child to himself. He said, “Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” Jesus’ point was that entrance to God’s kingdom isn’t earned by achievement or pedigree, but in simple response to Jesus’ invitation.

Within a short time, Jesus would demonstrate how this open invitation to God’s kingdom is made possible. As he hung dying on the cross, he gave up everything—his honor, his dignity, even the comfort of his Father’s presence. He cried, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” so we could be welcomed as God’s sons and daughters. Without Christ, nothing holds ultimate value. With him, you gain everything.

Why This Matters

To Young People: Children Are a Blessing

In a culture that often mocks large families or views children as an obstacle to personal success, young people need to hear that children are a blessing. Parenthood is not an impediment to purpose. It is not a “lesser” life. In a despairing culture, having and raising children can be a countercultural act of hope.

In his article, “The Case for Kids,” Kevin DeYoung writes:

Pastors . . . should make sure their people know that the most direct path to changing the world starts with changing a diaper. Too often Christian leaders lay impossible burdens on their people, insisting that they solve a host of social ills and become experts in a thousand different areas, forgetting to assure them that to get married, raise children in the church, and stay married is a life well lived. Women in particular need to know that motherhood is not a lesser calling, an interruption in the real business of life or an impediment to their being truly purposeful.

To the Childless: You Are Not Incomplete

For those who long for children but do not have them—whether due to infertility, singleness, or estrangement—the Bible offers profound comfort. Isaiah 54:1 says, “Sing, O barren one, who did not bear . . . for the children of the desolate one will be more than the children of her who is married.” In Matthew 19:29, Jesus promises that those who sacrifice for His sake will receive “a hundredfold.” Through the church, God gives spiritual children to the childless. As Jesus hung on the cross, He turned to His mother, Mary, and the disciple John, saying, “Woman, here is your son,” and to John, “Here is your mother” (John 19:26–27). Even in His dying moment, Jesus was creating family beyond bloodlines. In the family of God, childless people find children, and parentless children find parents.

To Parents: God Is Parenting You

To exhausted parents who feel like they are failing: take heart. God is parenting you. Through every chaotic meal, sleepless night, and tearful prayer, he is shaping you into the likeness of his Son. Even in your weakness, Christ is strong. And when you feel overwhelmed, hear the invitation of Jesus: “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matt. 11:28)

To Children: You Belong at the Table

Children are not spiritual second-class citizens. In the kingdom of God, there is no “kids table” and “adults table.” Everyone, young and old, are children of God, seated at his table. Children are image-bearers, morally responsible, and spiritually addressed by God Himself. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord” means that your life matters now—not just someday. You are called, seen, and loved by Jesus.

To the Church: We Have Hope and a Mission

In the Bible’s visions of the future age, children are everywhere—safe, joyful, and playing. Isaiah imagines a child reaching into a snake’s den without fear (Isa. 11:8–9). Zechariah pictures the streets of the city full of boys and girls playing safely (Zech. 8:5). A world safe for children is a world healed.

That is where history is headed, and the church is meant to be a preview of that coming reality—not a utopia, but an outpost. A place where children are welcomed, parents are strengthened, and spiritual family flourishes.

We cannot bring heaven to earth. But we can begin, in our pews and homes, to live like citizens of the world to come. We can honor childhood, protect children, cherish family, comfort the barren, and rest our identities, not in what we produce or whom we raise—but in the one who calls us his children.

This post is an adaptation of a sermon preached on Sunday, May 11, 2025.